Marketing really is amazing, isn’t it?
What other profession can take something really ordinary and make it sound like having smoked salmon coated in avocado and slid carefully up your arse?
Here’s a case in point: The HØVEL pencil plane.
To any normal person it’d be a pencil sharpener shaped like a block plane. To a marketing copywriter the HØVEL ‘enables you to whittle your pencil perfectly to any desired point’. And being made of brass doesn’t make it a heavy chunk to carry around. It’s weight ‘…is a joy, and it gains beauty and character with age’.
It’s a frigging pencil sharpener. It does the same job as the chisel already in the tool bag, but without all the manbun dribble.
We did think it was a nice-looking bit of gear though, and we were really tempted to get one, but at $145 from etsy.com we quickly remembered we lived in the real world and a plastic sharpener knocked off from a kids’ colouring set would do the bizzo.